What is it like to be an exchange student?

This is what it's like to be an exchange student.
I arrive in this place called Japan. I am exhausted; nothing makes sense to me. I have left everything behind me - my friends, my family, my language, my culture, even myself (for aren't these the elements of which we are made?)
I feel so helpless initially. I never know where I'm going, with whom I'm speaking, what I'm eating. Everyone stares at me, expects too much from me, expects too little from me. Nothing makes sense. Why doesn't my host family keep soap in the bathroom? What don't strangers say "sumimasen" (excuse me) when I bump into them? Why does the word for "buttocks" get an honorary prefix?
However, this country slowly starts to make sense to me. I start to learn the language, understand the culture, make new friends. But still, there are times when it's HARD. When I would give anything to be back at St. Joe's, or Menlo Park, or New York with friends. I realize, however, that if I were to go back to the USA, I would miss Japan just as much as I miss the USA now. This is when I must become my own best friend.
It's almost as if I have no home. When people ask me about my family, I must always ask them if they refer to my American or my Japanese one. I begin to refer to 1-28-5 Sumiyoshi Naka-ku as my home. This is when I must make my home within myself.
I call my American parents for my birthday, and I accidentally start speaking in Japanese. When I realize my mistake and switch to English, that language is actually physically exhausting to speak. I write things in English and I must use a dictionary because I understand the Japanese word but don't remember the English equivalent. Engrish (horribly incorrect Japanese English on ads, fashion, etc.) starts to make sense to me. But if my English is quickly deteriorating and my Japanese is far from perfect, I have no language whatsoever. This is when I must realize the importance of the smile.
This feelings of estrangement have become rarer and rarer as I grow more accustomed to life in Japan. I begin to question the USA's way of doing things instead of the other way around. I am, as the song says, turning Japanese. American desserts have become too sweet for me; I have started to imitate the current styles I see on the street; my mindset is shifting to favor Japanese ideals and priorities, and it just took me literally five minutes to think of the word priority. I am having the time of my life in Japan. Japan is fun, beautiful, crazy, mysterious, wild, surprising, complex, aggravating, rewarding, unbelievable, hot, delicious, life-altering. I am learning so much: that stereotypes, even if they're true, are disgustingly overrated. Sometimes the wisest answer you can give to life's tough questions is "I dont know." It really doesn't matter what you do or where you are, but who you're with that counts. Life is full of surprises- some are good, some are bad. But whatever happens, you'll be all right, in the Grand Scheme of Things. Because that's just the way It works.
That's what it's like to be an exchange student.